Faith, Love and Respect for ALL

Archive for the ‘Diabetes’ Category

Our Week

As my father always says: “Do you want the good news or the bad news?” I always take the bad news first, so I think that is how I will deliver Our experiences this week.

The bad…

My best-friend, who just happens to be married to my uncle, had to put her furry child to sleep today.  Lulu has been a part of our family for 10+years and I simply cannot fathom going to their house and not seeing her. As adults we know she is no longer suffering, and has gone onto a better place where she will be sickly no more. This brings us solace and will help us with the grieving process; however, Beth does not understand these things. She is a child who will miss her and ask for her, she is a child that will break Marie’s heart every time she asks where Lulu is. How do I tell her Lulu is gone, and make her understand? I wish I knew the answer to that question, perhaps Beth will surprise us all, and understand everything in her own way. Perhaps she will be the key to healing for all of us.

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I have been having horrible pain in my right arm for a few weeks. I thought it was a pinched nerve or perhaps a pulled muscle. However once I accepted that nothing was working to make it better for any length of time I went to the doctor. It turns out I have arthritis in my shoulder.  So now I keep doing what I am doing (taking ibuprofen, doing stretches, icing it, massaging castor oil into it, and praying for relief). I have been dealing with arthritis in my knees for 20years, so I will find a way to deal with this too. We are getting healthy for our children and I will not let this stand in my way of being the fun-active mom I know I can be.
The good…

Today Beth brought me some books, crawled in my lap and actually sat and read with me.  She wanted me to read first, then paraphrased what I said or told me what she saw in the pictures. It was 20 minutes of pure bliss, especially since she let Anne sit with us during story-time.  Anne giggled, babbled and pointed to pictures and touched Beth as much as she could. It was one of the rare moments when they could tolerate each other, and their sisterly love shone through. It was a moment that my heart truly needed today, as always my girls heal my heart in a way that only they can. As if that was not enough pride and joy for mom, we had a tea party in the bath this evening, and it was wonderful. I can honestly say that it was the most peaceful and enjoyable bath the girls have had in quite some time.

After 6 weeks of committing to being Healthier Parents for our kids, Henry and I are making great progress. I have lost 17lbs and I am feeling better everyday. Henry has lost 20lbs and dropped his AC1 from 8.5% to 7.1%. Anything under 6.5% is considered non-diabetic, so we are definitely on the right track. We are making small, but effective changes,  and we can see tangible results. I am getting my stress/mood eating under control, and have been able to make better choices when I feel the need to eat my blues away. The best part for me was when I had a cola yesterday (in an attempt to boot a migraine), and it tasted horrible. Now if I can just get rid of my chocolate cravings, at least now I choose dark chocolate and have 1 or 2 squares and I am done. We are taking Baby Steps after all.

So there you have it, our week in review. There are always rainbows mixed in with the storm clouds, and we must always look for them, because they fill us with light and love. Have Blessed week friends, and be thankful for the clouds and rainbows that color your world.

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Autism Proud – Journey With Us – by Jest Tu Positive by Dorothy Stronglove is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

A New Way of Loving Food

It is no secret that Henry and I are obese; we are both at least 100+lbs overweight. Fortunately we are tall and we seem to carry it better. Most people do not believe me when I tell them what I weigh. It is also no secret that we, more often than not, make poor food choices and have absolutely no portion control. Our excuses have always been we LOVE food, and want to enjoy it. We often joke about being fat and happy, because all the skinny “calorie-counters” we know are miserable. You can be as glib and silly as you want, until your love for the wrong foods interferes with your life, then its time for things to change.

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Henry was diagnosed with Type II diabetes last year. He is struggling in several areas, and his diagnosis explains a lot. Until recently he was taking the medicine, but had not given any thought to changing his diet. I refuse to be his food warden! If my life experience and Al-Anon have taught me anything, it is that you cannot help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. People must choose for themselves how they want to live and what quality of life they want. I do not want people making life choices for me, and I refuse to make them for him; I simply love and respect him too much to attempt to control him. Henry is tired of feeling like crap, and dealing with his other issues, and has decided it is time for a change. He is attempting to change his lifestyle, so he can be healthier and feel better. As his partner, not his boss, I will be by his side to support and assist him in anyway; however, the best way I can help is by making better choices myself.

I am currently 293lbs, the only time I have ever been heavier than this, is when I delivered both my children. The depressing part is that a year ago, I was making real progress and was almost to my pre-Beth weight of 242lbs. Honestly,  242lbs is still too much weight for me to be carrying; my goal is to get under 200lbs by this time next year. My biggest problem is that I am a stress eater. I always crave ALL the wrong foods when I am stressed or depressed. Even though I don’t eat a lot of food in one sitting, I tend to finish all the girls food, because I can’t stand to waste anything; and I use my nervous energy to snack a lot. As if that isn’t bad enough, I am always looking for the quick fix to boost my energy, because I am exhausted most of the time. I don’t know exactly when it happened, but I have become that mom who needs to live on ibuprofen and heating/ice packs to truly enjoy her children. I am in constant pain.  Whether it is my headaches, the arthritis in my knees, the pain in my back or the latest pulled muscle due to lack of strength and toning, it doesn’t really matter where it hurts anymore, it is the fact that something hurts EVERY day, and I am tired of it! I simply don’t want to be that mom who is too overweight and out-of-shape to play with her kids and enjoy their childhood with them. I also don’t want to be in chronic pain anymore. I want to do better, MUCH better. I want to break the vicious cycle of stress/food/depression; I have decided it is time for a change.

My Al-Anon family and program remind me to keep the focus on me, to take care of myself and to make myself a priority. In the past year, I have been doing well at working my program on the spiritual level; however, I am failing on the physical level. I found my Al-Anon family because I was tired of repeating the same destructive, depressing, and stressful patterns in my life. How I ever thought I could only concentrate on one area is beyond me. Apparently, I just needed time to realize that I need to work on the entire package that is ME. When I dream of the legacy I want to leave my girls it is one of love, acceptance, faith, joy and hope. In order to help them build a solid foundation on their path, I must show them how to live a healthy life, both physically and spiritually.

Henry and I are embarking on a new path. We have to learn a whole new way of loving food. This journey will definitely be one of “Progress Not Perfection.” I expect there will be quite the struggle between the old and the new ways of viewing everything we put into our bodies. We just have to remember that this is not a race, and we need to take our time, so that we make this life change a positive experience for our family. We must keep our eye on the prize, which is being healthy and living a quality life, not only for ourselves, but for our beautiful girls as well. So we begin our journey, Baby Stepping our way to loving food in a healthier manner, to be Healthy Parents to our Extraordinary Children.

 

 

Creative Commons License
Autism Proud – Journey With Us – by Jest Tu Positive by Dorothy Stronglove is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

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